How to Prepare your Heart for the Next
Moving on can be hard, entangling yourself from the clasps of past mistakes, regrets and hurt is never easy especially when you have been the victim of repeated hurt. Hurt in this case may mean a failed relationship, loss by death or even divorce. When things are thick and everything is falling apart, it never looks like you are ever going to find love again. When you think about the sacrifices that you had to make and the good times shared, the wound grows deeper. Eventually, the question becomes inevitable, “will I ever be happy again?” There is hope with each passing day and love will find you if you’re ready for it. Here is how you prepare your heart for the next.
Self Realization
Whenever we get into any relationship, the phrase “I” seizes to exist and is quickly replaced by “We”. Most people loose themselves in their spouses’ likes and dislikes and in the process loose themselves in the relationship. This is only made clear when the relationship ends. Before throwing yourself out there, it is important to try and figure out why it didn’t work. Take ownership of your failures, own them and try to be a better person. Self realization is best down in hindsight and will help you approach the next relationship with a more positive attitude.
Forgive
That’s right! It’s not the easiest thing to do but it’s the right thing to do. Forgiveness sets you free from bitterness and gives way to a healing process. Letting go of past hurt breaks the shackles of insecurities and pain. Granted, there are a lot of people who have done you wrong that do not deserve to be forgiven but you are not perfect either. You have also wronged a few people and will do so in the future and in such a case, you too will want someone to forgive you. Forgiving helps you to let go of the past and focus on a healthier tomorrow
Time
From experience, jumping from one relationship to the next is never a healthy decision. In most cases, being in a relationship with the rebound guy is always a way of trying to get rid of your current pain. After 3 months of dating you realize that you weren’t really into the person and it becomes a messy situation all over again. You know the old cliché “Time is the best healer?” Well, it might be a cliché but it’s a true phase. Taking time to yourself after any loss or break up helps your heart to heal and gives you a clear perspective when approaching a new relationship.
Loose yourself in the feelings
No one likes to feel hurt, sad or depressed but leaning into these feelings is healthy. It’s okay to acknowledge that you are hurt, sad, disappointed and broken. These are the very first steps of healing. When you decide to live in denial instead and bury them, they manifest into different insecurities especially when you get into a new relationship.
